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yours,

yours, is a book of letters between me and twelve other people about our unspoken experiences of my transness.

In the type of feminism I encountered in college, there is a good and important assumption that when your loved one comes out as trans, you're not supposed to ask them questions. This assumption was essential for me in many ways; as a generally private person, I hated coming out, and the general lack of questions was one of the things that made the experience doable for me. But those silences meant that I spent an unbelievable amount of time trying to figure out what my coming out meant for other people. I guessed, I assumed, I intuited, I tried and failed to stop doing all of those things. I created yours, to open the black box of that experience. Of course, yours, is specific to my experience and to the people in my life, many of whom had some sort of understanding of transness before I came out; I was incredibly lucky to be certain going in that I would not lose a majority of the people in my life. My biggest dream for yours, is that it helps trans and cis audiences get a glimpse into one another's experiences and that it functions as a reminder that we can never truly know what anyone else is thinking or feeling.

One more note: I wrote the first round of letters in yours, in November and December 2015. Since then, my relationship with my body, my transness, and communicating with other people about those things has changed tremendously.

I made this playlist as I was making yours,. Due to Spotify limitations, it's a little off: Sleeper should actually be this cover by Eliza Gilkyson, Nightswimming should actually be this cover by Dashboard Confessional, and the last song should be a hidden track (don't peek!).